Tears

I wonder how your eyes since yearned for me

Not yearning, but yearning so much.

Long time ago 

Waking up under moonlight sheets of  your solace 

I held you together 

Felt the warmth of your skin under my cold rivers

I never wanted a show off so i have kept 

hidden

Myself 

beneath your 

frozen emotions 

and cursed sentiments 

and promises broken 

Calloused heart                  'Never so easily'

You said it goes 

armstoyourarms to             arm's    length

and 

on

and

on

And now at this very moment in time

I am unwanted 

or perhaps it felt like you longed for me long enough

To emerged brave 

To put myself out there 

Looking at the same ducts where I lived a thousand days 

Right across from another sight

Your eyes

glistening as I float to the curves of your nose to your bony cheeks 

I should have died right there 

Swallowed by the soft pillows and blankets and mattress

'Such heavenly way to die'

But there's even more beautiful way than to die like that

I figured 

When he holds me by the warmth of his thumb pressing me against your soft skin

drops burst and I turn into lake 

or an ocean 

Or joy.